Relationship Advice
by Rochellu
Summary: "Come onnnnn. Bolin the Matchmaker's services require a certain type of payment, y'know! It just so happens to be… in–for–mat–ion, " he overstressed every syllable slowly, mirth dancing in his green eyes. She'd break. It was just a matter of how many seconds it would take for that to happen.


**A/N:** oh goddd what have i done i don't know what this is

i really liked the idea of asami struggling with super strong feelings for korra and being desperate enough to actually believe asking bolin for romantic advice was a good idea

**Description:** "Come onnnnn. Bolin the Matchmaker's services require a certain type of payment, y'know! It just so happens to be… in–for–mat–ion, " he overstressed every syllable slowly, mirth dancing in his green eyes. She'd break. It was just a matter of how many seconds it would take for that to happen.

**Characters:** Asami, Bolin, Korra

**Ship:** Korrasami

"Dating advice? From _me_?" Bolin blinked in confusion. Normally he'd be flattered, delighted, and of course, his ego would inflate seven fold. However, now he was just… _baffled_.

Asami Sato had probably dated more people than Bolin had ever known. That was probably the understatement of the _year_, even. And he could easily understand why—Asami's intellect was as impressive as her appearance. Her accomplishments were astounding, and business was booming. And don't even get him started on her personality. Opal certainly was the girl for Bolin, but he couldn't deny that Asami and Korra were the two most eligible bachelorettes well… _anywhere._

Not to say either of them needed to date someone. They both were plenty fantastic on their own, and Bolin would defend both of those statements to his grave. It just astounded him that Asami Sato came to_ him_ first.

"Well, technically, I'm not dating anyone. More like… what do you think would be a… um… suitable way of admitting … certain feelings … to…_ someone_," Asami slowly phrased, mentally smacking herself for sounding so terribly inelegant and clumsy with her words.

"I've been in plenty of relationships and even initiated some, but… I keep getting mixed signals and I'm not sure if I'm reading too much into them. They're … different than anyone else I've ever been interested in and this is just…_ really_ important to me."

Bolin's confusion was ebbed away as a grin found itself onto his face.

"Come _onnnnn_. Bolin the Matchmaker's services require a_ certain_ type of payment, y'know! It just so happens to be… _in – for – mat – ion_, " he overstressed every syllable slowly, mirth dancing in his green eyes. She'd break. It was just a matter of how many seconds it would take for that to happen.

Bolin grin stretched further across his face, elbowing the engineer as he began to slam questions her way, rapid-fire.

"What's he like?"  
>"How long have you known each other?"<br>"When did you first realize you liiiiiked him?"  
>"Do we know each other?"<br>"_Is he gorgeous."_

Asami shuffled her foot against the ground. "I, uh—well." She bit her lip.

"You most certainly… know them." Bolin's eyes lit up.

"How about I guess, then! If it's hard for you to say, maybe that'll make it easier! Not to brag, but, guessing has _always_ been a talent of mine."

Asami hesitated. Well… that _would_ be less awkward and maybe if it didn't completely blindside him, there was some hope after all.

"…Okay."

Little did Asami know that she had just opened Pandora's box and would regret this obviously questionable (_at best_) decision in less than three seconds.

"Hm," Bolin tapped his chin, "Mako?"

Asami sighed. "Been there, done that."

"Tahno?"

"Who?"

"General Iroh?"

"Well… I mean—Wait. _No_."

"Wing or Wei?"

"I can't even tell them apart half the time. Don't bother going through every single Beifong."

"Desna?"

"Uhh no."

"Bataar Jr.?"

"It's not a Beifong."

"Wu?"

"You're joking, right?"

"Huan?"

"Bolin, I promise you for the last time that it _is not a Beifong_."

"Tenzin?"

"What?"

"Varrick."

"Never."

"…Zaheer?"

"Now you're just being ridiculous."

Bolin sighed. He'd listed every male he could think of that they both knew. He figured Asami wasn't familiar with people like Skootchy or Shady Shin, so there was no possible explanation he could think of. Asami must have been too embarrassed to admit who it was when he guessed.

_That's okay_, Bolin thought confidently, _I'll just back her into a corner. Then she'll _have_ to tell the truth._

"_Gimmie a hiiiint_," he begged. Asami sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. Why was this so hard?_ Why._

"Um."

"Ooh, ooh, I know! Do they bend?"

"Yes." Asami was almost as nervous about this question as much as grateful.

"Are they a waterbender?"

"Yes."

"So Tahno or Desna."

"_No_."

Bolin groaned. "I'm very confused."

Who had he missed? He'd have to cross analyze nearly every person he'd interacted with in the last four years and compare that to just about everyone Asami's interacted with and spirits only know just how many people that is and maybe Asami had a thing for _Unalaq_ or _Tonraq_? No way. …Well, no need to jump to conclusions.

"So they're from a water tribe?"

Asami felt her heart rate speed up. "_Yes_," she breathed.

"And uh… this person once became a giant made of spirit-y energy and stuff?"

"Yes," the girl opposite of him said, nodding slowly as she knew now that Bolin _must_ have figured it out.

There was a tense moment of silence before Bolin managed to find words.

"_Asami._ You should know just as well as any of us that Unalaq kinda met the end of the line. Not to mention he kindof tried to take over the world with his bad vibes and kill everyone and—"

"Spirits, Bolin! _Think._ Who else is a _waterbender_ from a _water tribe_ that we both know? Someone whose spirit_ also_ turned into a _massive being of light energy_? Someone that_ bends all four elements_?"

Bolin thought for a second. Well, Avatar Aang bended all the elements but that'd be kinda weird. Besides, he was an Air Nomad. The only other person since him that did any of that was…

Bolin's jaw dropped.

"_You_ have a _crush_ on _Korra_?" A deep flush spread across her cheeks. Asami quickly stepped forward, shushing him while putting a finger to her lips.

"Not so loud!" She hissed, "I don't want …_said person_… to somehow overhear you shouting." Bolin opened his mouth, only to close it again.

"Point taken." He hesitated. "Not that there's anything wrong with it! I promise! I didn't mean to assume, not at all, I just figured since you uh… kinda dated Mako that you were…"

Asami buried her head in her hands.

"Bolin. Is there a written rule anywhere that explicitly says I have to choose between men and women? _I wonder if there's an orientation that validates attraction to both._ Gee. That'd be ideal, I think."

Bolin opened his mouth, but stopped. He furrowed his eyebrows. He had been so focused on the male factor that he didn't even stop to think if women were an option or not.

_Whoops._

Laughing nervously, Bolin tugged at his collar. "_Yeaaaaah_ uh. Kinda didn't think that one through. Sorry for… wasting twenty minutes of your life." Asami groaned.

Bolin awkwardly continued laughing off his blunder until there was just silence.

Seconds later, he was estatic.

"Oh my spiiIIIRITS _you_ have a **_CRUSH_** on _KORRAAA_"

Asami whacked him, probably about fifty shades of scarlet by this point. "Please, not so loud," she pleaded, "I've never had a friendship mean so much to me in my life and I've never been worried over the idea of someone in a romantic sense. I like Korra. _A lot_. She's so wonderful and special and she's _just_ the Avatar to so many people, but she's simply _Korra_ to me. I'm a nonbender, but she's the most powerful person on the face of this planet. I always heard as a child how the Avatar changed lives, and she's most certainly changed mine in a way I _never_ thought possible. She's my _best friend_. There's so much riding on this that I'm really worried I'm going to mess something up."

Bolin snickered.

"_Pleeaaaase,_ Asami. No need to sound so _worried_. You are with the master. I might be an earthbender, but I'm also a ~ _lovebender_ ~," cue eyebrow waggle, "I got your back. You shall have a date with destiny by the end of the day, my friend. Now, pretend I'm Korra."

"What?"

"Just talk to me as if I were Korra. You can start off by going into detail about how gorgeous she—I mean, _I am_," Bolin winked.

Asami rolled her eyes. "Do I have to?"

"Come on Asami, don't you think I'm beautiful," the earthbender remarked in a high pitched voice, _giggling_, "You can hold my hand, if you ask."

It was probably at that moment that Asami just gave up. This so called "expertise" was going to get her nowhere. Might as well go along with it.

The engineer gave a magnificent, sweeping bow.

"Oh, _Avatar Korra_," she purred as she took Bolin's hand and placed a chaste kiss on it, "Beautiful doesn't _begin_ to describe you. You take the_ air_ out of my lungs and leave me breathless. You're ground breaking, _earth_ shattering. You're so hot that you're on _fire_. Don't even get me started on just how _wet_—"

Asami froze when a loud guffaw cut her off. Bolin squeaked and hid behind the CEO of Future Industries as Korra limped into the room, weak with laughter.

"Gee, Asami, why don't you tell me how you really feel?"

Bolin looked between both young women, getting more and more uncomfortable by the second.

"I'm just gonna… I'm just gonna go now." And like that, he was gone.

Korra wiped her eyes. "Whew. Sorry, I was trying really hard to be quiet but Bolin just made it _so hard_—" Asami stared at Korra, wide-eyed, mouth agape. Her face was incredibly hot and probably more scarlet than anything she'd ever laid her eyes on.

"How much did you hear?" she asked tentatively.

"Well, I heard everything from when Bolin decided it was _more_ plausible you had a crush on my power hungry uncle_ than_ a woman. I gotta hand it to him, he sure can make someone's day." A small smile tugged at Asami's lips.

"So… you don't mind?"

"Don't mind? Don't mind? I'm _relieved_! All this time I thought you had a thing for _Unalaq_ of all people and thank the spirits that theory has been shot down."

The nonbender whacked the Avatar. "Be serious!" However, Asami already knew Korra didn't mind in the least, based on how carefree she was acting. In fact, she hadn't seen Korra like this in a long time. Korra smiled her wide, lopsided smile, the one that could never fail to take leave Asami breathless, the one that was so contagious that she herself couldn't help but grin, too.

"I am being serious, and I am relieved, 'cause, well, there's a certain nonbender that means a whole lot to me too," Korra waggled her eyebrows as Asami's mouth dropped.

"Oh my spirits. When you say nonbender, you couldn't mean _Prince Wu_, could you? I never knew you thought_ so_ highly of him, but I'm sorry. I don't think you hold him in as high regards as Mako's grandma does."

Korra snorted, elbowing the engineer, but Asami just smiled.

"I like you a lot, Korra," she said softly, "And I meant everything I said, one hundred percent. You're_ amazing_." Korra beamed.

"I've got nothing on you. Given us being in such a hilarious situation right now, I couldn't possibly find the words to do my feelings justice and I'm sorry for that," Korra admitted, grabbing Asami's waist and pulling her in. Their eyes open, hooded, then closed.

"But I can show you."

(To this day, Asami couldn't believe how well Bolin did his job for actually giving her zero advice whatsoever. He's still speechless regarding how Korra walked in on him impersonating her and refuses to talk about it.)


End file.
